Podcast:Modern Love Published On: Wed Oct 18 2023 Description: Deanna Fei did not need a man. She was in her 20s, living in Shanghai on a Fulbright scholarship, writing her first novel: a book about fiercely independent Chinese women, very much like Deanna herself.Growing up as a first-generation Chinese American, Deanna resented the way some men, specifically white men, looked down on her. She refused to be anyone’s fetish. By the time she arrived in Shanghai, she had sworn off dating white men all together.But then, Deanna met a man: an older, successful white man, who offered to provide for her as she pursued her dreams. Was Deanna betraying herself, once she started falling in love with him? Unlock full access to New York Times podcasts and explore everything from politics to pop culture. Subscribe today at nytimes.com/podcasts or on Apple Podcasts and Spotify.