The Family Goals Podcast
The Family Goals Podcast

Your family can do things differently and the payoffs are worth it! Each week on the Family Goals Podcast, Graham and Shay Cochrane share hope and actionable wisdom around the areas of marriage, family culture, parenting, money, work, and entrepreneurship.

Do you wanna hear some good news? It is completely possible to eliminate money fights. A year from now, you could literally not have had a single money fight over the course of the next 12 months. It's possible, we've seen it, we've lived it, and today we're gonna be talking about our two favorite hacks to get you there as it relates to typical money stresses and how you can just entirely eliminate them.
We like to talk about money on this show because money affects every single one of us, whether you have a lot of it or a little bit of it. And money fights are the number one cause of divorce in marriage. Money generally can split up families long after kids are grown and out of the house. So it's clearly something worth talking about. In today's episode, what we're going to do is help you by revealing to you the source of all of your money fights and then give you a tool to solve that problem and have more unity in your marriage when it comes to money.
When marriage just sucks and we're disconnected, where things are just stale, we don't know what to talk about, and it's easier to just pick up our phone instead. Maybe we're holding on to some hurt, frustration or bitterness, maybe we feel disconnected and we don't even know why. Believe it or not, even on the Family Goals podcast, we hit major ruts in marriage on the regular. If we're just stuck in that spot, this is the tool we use to get out of that.
It's just the inevitable reality that, when you first get married, it's awesome and it's all about the marriage, but once you start having kids, your home life becomes all about the kids, their health and needs, and that's just the way it goes. Is that really the best way? And what's the difference between a child -centric home versus a marriage-centric home? What truly helps the whole family thrive? These are the questions we're diving into today on the Family Goals Podcast.
Your family will never have full fulfillment if you're doing what every other family's doing. Your family needs to be its own unique version of itself. You need to be a rebel family. It's time to push against the crowd and whatever everyone else is doing and be you. This is is the final part of our three part rebel family series to help you uncover your uniqueness and identity as a family so that you'll have more satisfaction, more joy, and more peace as a family. Let's dive in!
Welcome to part 2 of a 3 part series on how to be a rebel family. All of this in celebration of the launch of Graham's book, September 3rd, Rebel, Find Yourself by Not Following the Crowd. Last episode, we talked about the problem of conformity and really we talked about the pain that you're feeling due to decisions you're making that you may not even realize. Areas you're conforming, you may not even realize you're conforming in. This week we're gonna really dive into the power of uniqueness in the context of family. I cannot wait for this episode. Let's jump in. Pre order Graham's book Rebel here: https://www.grahamcochrane.com/rebelbook
We believe so strongly that your family has a unique family identity that we're going to dedicate the next three episodes to talking about how you can find your unique family identity, be a Rebel family, by not conforming to the way everybody else is doing family these days. I am so excited. All of this is in celebration of the launch of Graham's book, Rebel, coming out on September 3rd. We've built some incredible content around what it looks like to be a rebel family in a culture of conformity. I cannot wait to jump in. Pre order Graham's book Rebel here: https://www.grahamcochrane.com/rebelbook
Parenting advice from parents is one thing. Getting the perspective of their teenage kids is another! Today I bring on my 15 year old daughter Chloe to ask her some pointed questions and get her honest feedback on our parenting decisions. This ought to be fun! Chapters 00:00 Introduction and Purpose of the Interview 02:03 The Strengths and Weaknesses of the Family 09:14 Fostering a Strong Sibling Bond 15:23 The Importance of Rules and Boundaries 27:23 Modeling Faith and Spiritual Growth
We're talking about rest today. This is part two of a simple two -part series. We talked about physical rest last week, the external rest. How can you cultivate some rhythms or practices to create space to rest as an individual, a couple, family, et cetera. So definitely check out that episode. It's gonna be some food for thought and hopefully encourage you and challenge you to create your own forms of physical rest. We gotta fight for rest. Today, though, we're gonna slip into the internal. What are the things that will help create internal rest or peace or calm or stability? And what are the things that actually take away that internal rest and peace? Because I think that's the biggest part of it all is what we all want. So let's dive into how to have more internal rest. Chapters 00:00 Introduction and Recap of Part 1 02:13 The Connection Between External and Internal Rest 08:18 Cultivating Internal Rest: Tips and Strategies 19:35 Defining Enough: Finding Contentment and Peace 29:20 Knowing Your Triggers: Protecting Your Internal Rest 36:23 The Impact of Internal Rest on Relationships and Well-being 39:20 Gratitude and Conclusion
Anybody out there just tired? This is for you if you are like most of America, burning the candle at both ends with no real sign of any change in sight. We want to talk about rest in a two-part series. First covering external rest, rhythms of external rest, and then the second one will cover rhythms of internal mental, emotional, heart rest. Let's dive in!
I know work-life balance is a phrase that people just love to hate on for some reason right now, but I think it's generally because we're not doing a great job of balancing work and life. And so we just dismiss it. What we want to talk about today is how to have alignment with your work and life so that they can actually complement each other and not create a space for resentment or bitterness or tension in your family. Our goal for today's episode is to help you have a thriving family and we're going to look at it through the lens of work -life alignment.
There was a season I remember very well when it felt like we were doing nothing but disciplining all the time. It was absolutely exhausting and I felt like we were failing as parents because it felt like they weren't learning anything. And then somehow, I don't remember where, but I learned this one hack that I kid you not changed everything almost from day to day. That's what we're gonna talk about on today's episode of the Family Goals Podcast.
Shay and I have a strict no yelling policy in our marriage. We have had it from day one, and it wasn't actually something we officially signed, it just is something that happened kind of organically. Over time, we've realized that this is a bit rare and we've seen the benefits of it. When we've counseled couples, we've zeroed in on this issue of yelling in their marriage. Today, we are going be talking about why we believe you should create a no yelling policy and how to make one. We will give you some hope, and a picture of what a yelling free marriage and home could look like and how it could benefit you.
The one thing that we get asked the most about as a couple, is how do we handle kids and technology? Definitely a hot topic. This is going to be a quick and dirty episode talking about how we have handled tech with our kids. We haven't done everything right. We aren't doing everything right now. But there are certain things that we have seen pay off. It's a conversation that every parent has to be having. So let's do it.
Parenting little kids is so freaking hard. Can we just say that? Hey, this episode is for you moms and dads that still have little kids in the house. We're gonna spend the next 30 minutes pumping you up with encouragement. So, if you're just having one of those days and you're not feeling for it, the barf is everywhere, the minivan is a mess, and you aren't getting any love or appreciation for all you do for your wonderful little kids, put this episode on repeat and let us pour some life into you!
What's the secret to winning as a dad? What truly makes a great father? While I (Graham) haven't completely figured that out I want to talk today about the art of fatherhood and how we men can grow as dads to be the best dad our kids could ever have.
Forward this to your single friends. Today we're talking about nine red flags to watch out for when dating. These aren't all "deal breakers" but they certainly are a warning sign that at least an intentional conversation is needed. Remember, you get to choose your spouse, so choose wisely! Let's jump in!
In our marriage, Shay and I have experienced everything financially from living on food stamps to paying off our mortgage. And when we think back to what helped set us up for success, we believe there are two things that we've done that I think have been the most financially life -changing in allowing us to experience health in our finances at this stage of the game. We're going to unpack those for you in today's episode.
Summer is right around the corner and with it is high hopes for amazing family vacations that are full of connection and memories. But if you're like us, then you've had plenty of vacations that end up being a disappointment and nothing but exhausting. We've had, you know, a few reps, family vacationing now with a daughter that's almost 15 and a daughter that is 12. And so in today's episode, we're going to be sharing with you the lessons we've learned on how to family vacay well for maximum connectivity and memory making.
Let's talk about a two -letter word, "no". Today we're sharing the things that we say no to with our kids. So all you parents out there, or soon -to -be parents, I know you love your kids and they're so cute and you wanna say yes, but you probably say no to your kids with certain things, and so what we thought we'd do in this episode is walk through the eight or so things that we say "no" to our kids about, and what we say "yes" to instead.
I already know right out of the gate, this is gonna be a controversial episode. We are talking through the seven boundaries that we have put in place from the very beginning of marriage to protect our marriage against infidelity. I don't know what you guys are gonna think about these, but they have served us and our goal is that you can maybe take one or two or be inspired to create some of your own so that we can all enjoy long, healthy, happy marriages.
If we did one thing right over the years it was to take one night or weekend out of the year to intentionally reflect and plan for the next 12 months. We've recently brought our kids into this process that we call a Family Vision Weekend. In this episode we're going to outline our entire process in the hopes that it will inspire you to do a Family Vision Weekend of your own! - Plan your own family vision weekend with our free guide at https://www.familygoalspodcast.com/familyvision
Families are more disconnected now than ever before. This culture of fast-paced busy-ness and distraction has eroded intimacy, connection, joy. And we have this crazy idea that this one ritual, this idea of fighting for the family dinner table, can impact everything else for the better in your family. Let's discuss. - Grab our 5 Connection Conversation Prompts at https://www.familygoalspodcast.com/connect
So I would say we have a pretty good marriage. Not a perfect marriage, but a pretty good marriage. But we've made a lot of mistakes over the years, and 18 plus years into this now, we were reflecting on what are the biggest mistakes that we've made, the things that have caused the most pain, have taken us down the wrong turns, the things that we wish we would have done differently, and the things that we've tried to actively improve upon. And that's what we're gonna talk about in today's episode of the five biggest marriage mistakes we've made and how we are in process on working on them. This ought to be fun. - Grab our 5 Connection Conversation Prompts at https://www.familygoalspodcast.com/connect
We haven't shared this publicly, but last year Shay took a complete six month sabbatical from work. Absolutely no work for six months. And for the first time ever, we're going to talk about the good, the bad, and the ugly, and the awesome of taking six months away from her company. - Grab our 5 Connection Conversation Prompts at https://www.familygoalspodcast.com/connect
It's no surprise, but money fights are listed as the number one cause of divorce currently in America. The tension and overwhelm surrounding money management is real. If you are a human with a pulse, especially if you are a married human, then you have felt that tension and you've cried those tears. But if you can get money management right, your marriage and your family are going to be, and for future generations, are going to be so much better off. So in this episode, we want to simplify money management by sharing the three things every family should do with their money. - Grab our 5 Connection Conversation Prompts at https://www.familygoalspodcast.com/connect